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Friday, April 18, 2008

Five-Star Mama

Great moms are like great chefs -- superb at substitution. Don't have buttermilk? Toss a little lemon juice into that whole milk and let it sit a few minutes. There's the old baking powder + cream of tartar trick. And scores of others I'm sure. Although in my house it's way easier to find baking soda than cream of tartar, that just tells you I'm not a great chef. But the principle of creative solutions? I've got the mom version down pat.

You know you're a Five-Star Mama when:

* you stir the fruit into the fruit-on-the-bottom yogurt in hiding, so the kids won't know it's not the blended kind which is always full of high fructose corn syrup;

* you use baby wipes to: blow a preschooler's nose at the library, dust the tv screen, remove stinky-sock smell from the toddler's feet on a night when there's no time for a bath, and remove a stubborn stain from the hall carpet all in the SAME day;

* you count Craisins as a vegetable at lunch (for one meal, all that really matters is that their little internal plumbing doesn't get stopped up -- and dried fruit is great for that, right?)

* you slather on Vasaline to protect a diaper rash when you run out of diaper cream;

* you spoon sugar-free applesauce from a giant jar into little single-serving cups to approximate the more expensive packaging;

* you aren't above using Baby Magic Lavendar and Camomile Calming Bath Wash during your own shower when your Oil of Olay Body Scrub runs out (calming is good, right?);

* you make pancake batter in the blender, using whole oats, half a block of tofu, a whole apple, some vanilla yogurt, eggs, and a scant 1/2 cup of whole wheat flour. And the kids LOVE it.

If you do most of these things, you are indeed a Five-Star Mama deserving of a crown or some other accolades.

Either that or, you really really REALLY need to go to the grocery store.

Now, where did I put my keys again?

29 comments:

Kimmylyn said...

I indeed need a crown though I am no where near as inventive as you with the food. :)

I have also been known to use the baby shampoo when I run out.. LOL

mommythe said...

great idea for pancakes! thanks. hope you don't mind if i add you in my linky link.

lattemommy said...

You are, indeed, a five-star mama. I'm nowhere near that creative!

LceeL said...

Hard to be a 5 Star Mama when the plumbing is all wrong. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. I LIKE being a man. It means I get to LOVE women (I mean that in the most benign fashion, so get your mind out of the gutter) and I really enjoy that. Especially 5 Star women. I happen to have one in particular that I am especially fond of. SWMBO. 5 Star.

MIQuilter said...

What about if you run out of dog food in the morning, forget to pick it up on the way home from work, too tired to go out so you just feed the dog cat food? That's gotta count for something.

Or when you bathe them using head and shoulders when you run out of their shampoo. I know, you're thinking "but your dog doesn't have dandruff"..... EXACTLY.

Fawn said...

Haha, MIQ! Our dog has all sorts of allergies (pork, soy, duck, lamb, potato, barley, wool, cats...) so we can't feed him cat food. When WE run out of dog food (which we have to buy from the vet) it's time to start thawing out the frozen ground beef or stew meat. Not exactly frugal, hunh?

MT, wow, how did you come up with that pancake recipe?! At our house, the girl gets plain vanilla yogurt with a bit of maple syrup to sweeten it... and she loves it! Sometimes I mix in raisins and coconut and pecan; when it sits overnight, the raisins plump up and... ahhh, it's good!

And Craisins definitely count. Well, maybe not as a vegetable, but fruits and veggies are in the same food group, so who cares?

Fawn said...

Whoops - I meant plain old-fashioned yogurt, not vanilla. But sometimes I add vanilla, too.

Mr Lady said...

If I go strictly by your scale, I should be accepting my mother of the century crown any day now.

Except for the tofu pancakes. the only thing I make with tofu is my way to the door.

Nicole said...

I fit into way too many of those, but haven't tried the pancakes in the blender yet!

Tara R. said...

That pancake recipe sounds wonderful... mind if I borrow it. I'll give you all the credit.

*****

(Craisins aren't a real vegetable? - bummer.)

Mrs F with 4 said...

I bow down to your superior mama-skills....

I didn't know about buttermilk, what on EARTH are craisins? my children loathe applesauce with a passion, and I don't believe I've ever knowingly eaten tofu, in a pancake or otherwise.

But... I can make muffins or biscuits from a nearly bare cupboard, soup from anything that stands still long enough (or submits after a brief and futile struggle); I know that swishing rice around in a vase removes stubborn stains from glass; and I can remove the vile and disgusting odour of cat pee from carpets with three household ingredients...

One and a half stars, I think.....

MIQuilter said...

oh Mrs F... the "removing cat pee smell" solution is worth AT LEAST 2 stars by itself!!! It, of course, begs the question... and what would those 3 ingredients be?

Also - crasins are dried and sweetened cranberries.... they're similar in size to raisins but are lovely and tart. The only thing that I don't like about them is that they're always sweetened, whereas most other dried fruit does not have any added sugar.

Mrs F with 4 said...

OK, MIQ, for an extra star-and-a-half.... to remove cat (and dog) pee stench from carpet.... you will need....

If the stain is still wet, blot up as much as you can. Then soak a white cloth (not paper towels, no matter what the ad says, they really aren't man enough for this) in a solution of 1 teaspoon colourless (or white) dishwashing detergent mixed with 1 cup lukewarm water. Not hot water, and try not to get bubbles! Blot the area thoroughly, but don't scrub it.

Soak up as much liquid as poss with another white towel. Then blot area again with solution of 1 part white vinegar to two parts lukewarm water.

Soak up as much water again as you can. Cover are with white towels, put something heavy on it (possibly the body of the guilty animal?) and leave for a few hours.

I know it seems like you need an inexhaustible supply of white towels, but hey, I admitted defeat with the birth of child 4 and bought bath towels in other colours. Like 'mud'.

Hope this helps - honestly, it does work! Pee is about the only thing Mr Clean's Magic Erasers can't help with....

Mrs F with 4 said...

And MIQ, thanks for the craisin explanation. Apparently I should get more. Preferably to the supermarket. By myself.

Heather said...

You've got me whooped on the pancake batter.

MommyTime said...

Mrs F, you deserve all the stars, for sure!

Kim, I'm so glad I'm not the only one taking recourse in baby products! (The Burt's Bees Baby Bee Buttermilk lotion is particularly nice, too, in case you were wondering... :)

Kalamazoo Mom of 2 said...

WOW - that pancake recipe sounds awesome .... will try it (maybe minus the tofu because it scares me!) ....
Craisins TOTALLY count as a fruit/veggie - dammit!

I get some stars, but not 5 ... Today, I literally did everything on your list except the pancakes in a blender and the Baby Magic bath .... too late for one, maybe I'll raid the kids bathtub right now ....

Betsy Bird said...

I've got to try the pancakes! Between those and that birthday cake a few days back, you really are the chef extraordinaire.

Kupiec Baby Blog said...

Very impressed with your creativity! Those pancakes sound delish.

foolery said...

I tend to be more of a five ALARM mommy.

But I really want to try your pancakes . . . how much oatmeal? How many eggs? Dunno if i can get away with making pancakes without buttermilk for my crew, but . . . SUBSTITUTIONS are the answer! :)

mommypie said...

Does cutting apple juice (and all that sugar) with water count? Maybe that just makes me a Cheap Mommy and not a Five Star?

Although I DO use baby wipes for EVERYTHING -- you're so right -- they're perfect for the tv and dusting. I especially love them for cleaning all the little nooks and crannies in the car ...

And, I'm FINALLY working on my book meme tonight, so if I don't fall asleep it'll be up tomorrow!

Purple Teacup said...

First time here....OK, so I do all of those things except the pancake thing because I use a gluten-free base. I am not a big fan of Craisin poop....

BusyDad said...

ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT! What a great post. I am a 5-star mama! Kinda.

MommyTime said...

K'zoo mom, the tofu hides completely; you'd never know it was there. I came up with this recipe back when my kids were rejecting most proteins.

Purple teacup, thanks for coming by and commenting too! The recipe can be made without any flour at all if needed. See notes below.

MommyTime said...

For those of you who asked, here's the recipe for the pancakes. Keep in mind that I'm a "toss it in and adjust as necessary" kind of cook, so you may need to tinker slightly with the proportions.

1 cup rolled oats, 2 eggs, 1/2 block tofu (or not, as you wish), 1 whole apple (quartered and cored but not peeled), 1/2 cup vanilla yogurt (or use plain, but then add 1 tsp. vanilla and 1 tablespoon sugar to batter also), 1/4 cup milk, 1/2 tsp. baking powder, and approximately 1/2 cup whole wheat flour. You can also use ricotta cheese instead of the yogurt for something a bit more savory. And, you can increase the oats and leave out the flour entirely if you need to be gluten free. Put ingredients into blender in order listed, and puree until smooth. If too thin, add a bit more oats or flour. If too thick, add a touch more milk.

Cook on slightly lower heat than usual, so that they cook all the way through.

MommyTime said...

Oh, and on the pancakes, you can make them without apple or without tofu or without whatever else you don't have. Just adjust the proportions of wet and dry appropriately.

Huckdoll said...

Oohh, I really like the pancake suggestion! I'm going to try it and we'll see if the world's pickiest eaters bite.

Caffeine Court said...

Wow-you ARE good! I'd probably give myself 3 stars...

foolery said...

Thanks, Miss MT, for the recipe. Already printed it out, and all I need to buy is the tofu! I think I'll try beating the egg whites separately and folding them in last, just because I LOVE to make more work and dishes for myself. THANK YOU!

-- Laurie

 

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