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Monday, May 19, 2008

On Being Four

If you try to explain to a four-year-old that it's really much easier to rip duct tape than cut it, he will not listen. Because he already knows it is "the strongest tape in the world," and obviously mere human hands will not be sufficient to sever such strength. And so he will INSIST on using the scissors. And you will be wise to let him work on this for a while on his own. You will probably be able to answer several emails or enjoy an uninterrupted cup of coffee while staring dreamily out the window before he finally wanders into the kitchen and presents you with this

and says, "Mama, can you help me? I've tried every kind of tricks and it just won't cut."

* * * * *

If your four-year-old accidentally pulls down a bath towel from a high towel hook, and you have trained him well, he will try to hang it up again.

If you just say nothing and watch, you may wonder why he is pulling over the bathroom scale to stand on. Just keep watching. He will probably stack onto the scale the little box that holds the wet wipes for cleaning unmentionable places when toilet paper is insufficient. Since that stack is only 8" high however, and the hook is a good six feet in the air, he will need to add something to what you will realize is his growing step ladder. Try to restrain yourself to silent laughter when he adds a very large baby doll to the top of the pile and then stands on her face to see if NOW he can reach up to re-hang the towel. (He can't.) Be suitably impressed when he chooses to put the magazines from the floor on top of the scale and under the box of wipes, as they are large and will indeed work best at the bottom of the pile. Do not wonder too hard why there is an icepack in your shower because you won't be able to answer that question. Do feel free to fall off the potty in complete hysterics when the icepack is added to the dolly's chest and he finds in frustration that even now he cannot reach high enough. But when the whole pile slides out from under him thanks to the slippery magazine pages and the precariousness of the dolly's chest as a resting place for an ice pack, do not make it clear that you are laughing at him. Obviously, you are only laughing at the one-legged baby doll that used to be your pride and joy when you were five, and that now must suffer eyelash-less as a stepping stone for domestic chores.

21 comments:

Jen said...

Sounds like you have one clever little boy! I'd be proud of his determination. I'd also be laughing too!

MultiplesMommy said...

You (or should I say Son) are hysterical! You did, indeed, make me laugh out loud this Monday. I do just have to add that, overprotective Mama that I obviously am, I would have had a heart attack at the ladder long before the ice pack made it onto the babydoll!

MIQuilter said...

I'm sorry that your son wasn't nearly as ingenious as his aunties..... I remember when MM and I made a "fort" for ourselves. It was on the top shelf of my bedroom closet (which must have been around 6 feet in the air). We piled stuffed animals on a rocking chair and scampered up. Voila! At least he gets points for originality and cleverness (for not putting the magazines on top - but placing them as appropriately as can be expected in the pile).

Aimeepalooza said...

our boys must somehow be related. I love that picture...it reminds me of my house!

BOSSY said...

Lord, what an amazing photo of that duct tape! Bossy has been there, but then again: we all have.

Kimmylyn said...

I so hear your pain on the determination of little boys. My three and a half year old will literally find whatever to balance himself on to get to any spot in the house I have said no too..

Great LOLM

Steph said...

Glad to know I am not the only mommy with a 4 year old that won't listen.

Auds at Barking Mad said...

There is only one thing worse than duct tape stuck to a pair of scissors....the hair, especially those little fly away hairs at the base of your neck.

Eventually it comes off. Painfully.

Too funny. Love your blog. Love it even more because I can totally relate so often.

cy said...

THAT is hilarious. cool blog!

It All Started With a Kiss said...

Thanks for the big smile! "...every kind of tricks..." LOL!

LifeatTheCircus said...

VERY funny! Don't you love trying to figure out what is going on in those precious little heads of theirs?

SherE1 said...

OMG - I was laughing out loud reading that one! So much determination - I love it!

Stacy said...

Okay, that one really got me! The picture of the tape and scissors. The price we pay for a little down-time, eh?

I don't even wanna know what my two are doing right now.

foolery said...

I almost hope you didn't try to disentangle the scissors. They would be a great memento kept for him in a cedar chest until high school or college graduation.

LOVE the description of the stacking. I could not have been silent; kudos to you.

Judith Shakespeare said...

LOL. Stepping stone for domestic chores, eh? I know that feeling.

Mrs F with 4 said...

What a guy.. how did you NOT snigger?!

Number 3 girl (aged 2 and a bit) can scale the dizzy heights of the kitchen larder cupboards, armed with her step, a stool, and probably crampons... all in pursuit of Mummy's secret hoard of chocolate (top shelf, at the back). THAT apple fell far from the tree.....!

MommyTime said...

So many new people here today! Thanks for the visit and for the great comments. I'll drop by your places in the next day or so to say hi "in person."

Aimee, perhaps our boys are... Certainly to the extent that all little boys are, they are related (as Bossy points out).

Auds, OUCH. That sounds awful!

Foolery and Mrs F, thankfully, he was so intently concentrating, that he didn't notice my mouth-open-gulping silent laughter, which almost made me cry because I was laughing so hard.

Storm said...

What a sweetie your ds is. And a very typical boy doing his hardest and providing great joy for you (and for us reading the blog). :)

Jessica said...

I am laughing so hard!

I hope you didn't hurt yourself when you fell off the potty. If you did, well, at least you have an ice pack handy!

mommypie said...

BAHAHA! Way to paint a HILARIOUS picture ... I can see it now ...

AND, you got Bossy to comment -- whoa.

john said...

Bingo with most entertainer

 

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