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Monday, June 16, 2008

Home on the Range

Cowboy Tuff Leader named himself. But no one was going to argue with his name. He was, after all, the toughest cowboy in the Lower Peninsula. His favorite color was "cowboy orange." And even though he was tough, if you didn't know that there was such a color, or exactly what shade of orange it was, he would explain patiently to you that it was "as orange as the color of a cowboy's letters." He was nothing if not a deep and philosophical tough cowboy.

One day, Cowboy Tuff decided that, like all good cowboys, he needed a slingshot. And, of course, he needed a container to hold his ammunition. So he appropriated his Little Sister's sippy cup (he was a broad-minded cowboy who didn't condescend to critiquing useful tools just because they might seem anachronistic), filled it with wads of paper, and took to the range to defeat the notorious Bad Guys. Within moments, he had the Bad Guys in his sights and the technique perfected.

Despite the lengthening shadows and glare of the setting sun, they didn't stand a chance against his mighty slingshot prowess.

READY...


AIM...


FIRE!

Celebratory dancing is of course a requisite part of any Cowboy's repertoire, especially after having defeated particularly BAD Bad guys. This is actually a tremendously tough skill to master, and not one that should be attempted lightly or by amateur cowboys. It involves coordination of many body parts, as well as facility with the nuances of music only discernible within one's own head. Cowboy Tuff wants you to know: You should not try this at home unless you have properly stowed both slingshot and ammunition first.

Fortunately for the less skilled on the range, Cowboy Tuff offers tutorials. They are free, and only require that you pay close attention to extensive monologues.

And stand back just a bit to make room for the talking hands. Which are, of course, the artistic side of tuff. Even cowboys need a little yin with their yang.

13 comments:

Lisa said...

I just showed my little cowboy this post. He is now even more excited than before to visit. He'll bring his cowboy hat and boots and perhaps Cowboy Tuff Leader can teach him how to make a sling shot.

LceeL said...

Cute. Make sure you teach him how to mosey. Because any good cowboy knows how to mosey. And to chew (bubblegum will do) but no spittin', 'cause that stuff gets nasty and womenfolk don't care for it much. And womenfolk are what all the moseyin' and chewin' are all about. Got to make a good impression. Yup.

MIQuilter said...

I would totally be a cowboy (I already have my own slingshot) except for that pesky dancing - the idea of moving multiple body parts in a coordinated manner is just not something anybody wants to see me try. Besides, I'm getting old, I'd probably break something.

OHmommy said...

Look at his release... perfect pose.

lattemommy said...

Awww... if you could package up that kind of cute and sell it, you'd be rich.

Aimeepalooza said...

That is one cute cowboy. Is it okay to call the cowboy cute? I figured with the dancing and the sippy cup he wasn't one of the narrow minded cowboys.

foolery said...

He's even got the English down pat -- check out his fingers after the shot. He's one rootin'-tootin' cowboy, ah reckon (in this part of the world we call 'em Mutton Busters at his age).

-- Laurie

Ms Picket To You said...

Willie Nelson was wrong. Mamas should let their babies grow up to be cowboys.

auds at barking mad said...

Awww precious. Makes me ache for the days when my boys, now 18 and 15 were little and so carefree.

Stacy (mama-om) said...

OMG, love the "only requires listening to extensive monologues" line.

Story of my life!

I think our boys are the same age.

MommyTime said...

Ms Picket -- welcome! And you are right on: his latest career ambition is cowboy. :)

Foolery, "Mutton Busters" is hilarious, and I can't wait to find a moment to drop that into conversation.

Lceel, you're right that momma don't much cotton to the spittin', but the mosey would be just fine...

Stacy, ah, yes, the preschool-alogue... it's a powerful thing.

Amy said...

Cute, cute post!! Love the dance!

Kimmylyn said...

How adorable are those pictures??

 

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