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Saturday, October 25, 2008

Trying to Focus

I keep starting posts, writing hundreds of words, deciding I hate them, and starting new posts. Since I can't seem to write a whole post of substance, here is a little collection of short thoughts and good things.

Husband did the grocery shopping yesterday on his lunch break, so I wouldn't have to do it with both children in tow. And then, last night I found out that he'd not only bought milk and yogurt and all the necessaries. He bought me this.


This is my all-time favorite ice cream flavor. It takes me back to my childhood (in good ways) with just one spoonful. And the occasional crunch of a peppermint candy? Perfection. The ice cream AND the husband.

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Facebook is freaking me out a little. On the one hand, it's full of awesomeness: I have reconnected with old friends I'd lamented were permanently "long lost." I've seen photos of the children of friends I didn't even know had children. I've gotten out-of-the-blue emails full of great news and chat. I've gotten birthday wishes, and get-well-soon wishes, and flowers for no reason at all.

On the other hand, I've been "super-poked" multiple times -- and for a woman who grew up at a time when "poke" was slang for, well, you know, wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am, the whole notion of a "super-poke" is really more disturbing than anything. I've been friended by people whose names I don't recognize, only to figure out after a day (or week) of puzzling, and looking carefully at their friends list, and scrutinizing the minuscule and inscrutable photo that doesn't really show me their faces at all, that they are people who were too Popular and Important to be nice to me in high school. Which makes me wonder a bit why they want to be my friends now. And I've written long and thoughtful emails in response to long-lost dear friends who'd found me and friended me, only to have them not reply. If they didn't want to talk to me, why did they find me? Did I offend them somehow in my email? Or are they just too busy to check Facebook?

And why am I not too busy to check Facebook? Actually, I am. But my gmail account gets updates if someone friends me or messages me, so that at least I won't miss any of the action when Jennifer Whatsername Popular gets in touch and wants to know how I've been since we graduated.

Facebook has become a conundrum I cannot figure out how to handle.

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It's the last week of October, which means only seven more days to add funds to the Literacy Funding Challenge. Those who have contributed have been amazingly generous. Thank you. We are only $20 away from another $100 in matching funds. If you've been thinking of doing something to help out children in needy schools, this is a great way to choose a specific project that you can be assured will make a difference.

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Having been out of town last week, and being sick before that, I am just now getting around to drawing the winner of the lovely scarf that is my idea of a karmic kind of reward for good deeds done. Thanks to random.org, we have a winner:

LaskiGal. A former teacher who currently stays home with her young son, LaskiGal has been donating her time for tutoring ever since her school district cut funding for the tutoring program. Congratulations, LaskiGal! And many thanks for your hard work.

Have a great weekend, everyone.

And if you have any Facebook advice, I'm all ears.

11 comments:

Jenn said...

Oh, that sounds so gooood ! I haven't seen it in our grocery store yet.

Deb said...

i am laughing about the facebook thing. i went through the same roller coaster at first (and we're only talking a couple of months ago). it has been great to reconnect with some great people from high school, and we've forged even better "friendships" now. but i KNOW there are a few that are mistaking me for a different, more popular debbie that had a similar last name.

E... said...

Let me know when you figure out facebook. I'm right there with you. It's a rabbit hole I tried to stay away from, but then was convinced by my dear friend that it would be okay. Mostly, it is. But I spend far too much time on it. I'm trying to keep myself to just communicating with those I know are my friends anyway, but who I can't otherwise talk to daily because we have small children who sense that a phone has been picked up and start behaving like wild things.

Lisa said...

Just a few days ago I had someone I don't know try to be my friend. I refused (as I always do with people I don't know). Well, since you can still send messages to people who aren't your friend, she kept writing me messages accusing me of appearing in the Apple store with my daughters(???) and some guy named Chris (?!?). And she informed me that Chris' dad had assured her that Chris was with some one of my exact first and last name, and that she was sure I had grown up on a specific street in San Jose (I grew up in VT). I had to tell her multiple times that I had no idea what she was talking about before she went away.

The best part of facebook is the mini-feed. Reading through it occasionally, I learn things about what my distant friends are up to that I would probably not know otherwise. And it is a good reminder to keep in touch.

Ree said...

No facebook advice here, because I can't seem to find any time to figure it out!

LaskiGal said...

So, the whole Facebook think sorta freaks me out. I was such a loner in high school.

I was elected on homecoming court just because no one had enough dirt on me not to elect me. I was the consummate wallflower. All those kids I went to school with are still the same, in my pea-sized memory. They have the same haircuts, same lame phrases dripping from their tongues, same popped collars, same snazzed up Chevettes and Escorts. Same . . .

Maybe connecting them would be like therapy . . . seeing how we've all grown and changed.

Maybe, or I can just live in the past and keep laughing my head off . . .

Thanks for the mention . . . you so didn't have to do that *blushing*

Amber said...

I have tone from 0 to 100 on Facebook in the past few weeks. Once you're in, it gets a bit addictive with reconnect with old friends.

And you're correct--it is funny how many of the cliques are banished or who does or does not respond. A dear friend I was THRILLED to reconnect with confirmed me as a friend but has yet to respond to my email. Am still scratching my head over that.

Fortunately, I have the same Peppermint ice cream in my freezer so I'll go stew over that.

MommyTime said...

Jenn, it's a "limited edition" flavor that seems to get reissued every fall for a month or so.

And, of course, my twin Amber is eating it right now too. ;)

Deb, and E... and Lisa and LaskiGal and Amber, I'm so glad to know that there are others out there struggling with the same things. It's some small comfort to know that it's not just me who finds some of this strange. Though, Lisa, I have to say that your story cracks me up the most!

Mrs F with 4 said...

Ohhh, Facebook. I'm feeling kinda lonely and unloved as I only have 27 friends. Apparently.

And that ice cream! I've NEVER seen it! Mr F is flying me to the US next weekend for a little shopping trip, so will be bringing a BIG cooler, lots of icepacks, and hoping that Canada Customs don't choose that day to inspect us on the way back in.

She... said...

Facebook seems to have confounded many people! Myself included for the first little bit. What I have found is that people who "didn't have the time for me" in high school really aren't as bad as my perception was. For this, I had to admit that I didn't give them much chance to be 'nice.' (This is from reunions, not from facebook.)

As far as Facebook goes, you don't have to be anyone's friend there who you don't want to be friends with 'in real life.' People generally have *way* more friends listed in their profiles than they could ever keep up with. I figure they won't miss me if I'm not on their list. :)

Enjoy it for the small contacts you receive/give, and discount the rest as 'kooky internet encounters,' and you'll enjoy it way more! (Just one girl's thoughts.)

Jaina said...

Wow, I need to get some of that ice cream, it looks perfectly delicious! I found friends from preschool on Facebook, it's fun. :) I don't talk to people regularly on Facebook, but it's nice to have the ability to (I get the email updates as well) I've had my Facebook since it started as colleges only. We were all a little dismayed when it went the way of MySpace, but with the privacy options, I decided to keep it. I don't waste as much time on it as I did sophomore year though...we all spent SO much time on Facebook that year. Haha.

 

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