Apparently You Can Zombify Anything

I just got an email from a former student of mine, letting me know about a great-sounding new novel to be released in April, which he thought might come in handy if I were at a loss for what to read next in a class at some point.

It's called Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

Some enterprising soul has taken Jane Austen's novel satirizing the early 19th century marriage market and turned it into a hard-core zombie book, complete with ninja scenes in which the Bennet girls (trained by Mr. Darcy) fight back against their zombie attackers. I'm not sure what you call a novel that parodies another novel that is in itself a satire, but I do admire the layered literary effort.

The kicker, for me, is that the writer claims he has managed to keep 85% of Austen's original text -- and still he's turned this into a zombie extravaganza on which Hollywood studios are already bidding despite the fact that the book has yet to be released. 85%! That is nothing short of stunning. That is more than is contained in a "respectable" abridged version of most Victorian novels. That is so much, in fact, that I wouldn't be surprised if more than a few students read this instead of the real Austen novel, figuring they will have gotten the gist of it, and that's what matters. And really, it's not like it will be that difficult to figure out which bits aren't original. Those would be the bits about the zombies.

Of course, it will take a slightly more trained eye to spot the revisions if they are all along the lines of the new opening sentence, which is purportedly, "It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains."

HA! Work out which bits are Jane and which bits are Seth Grahame-Smith there.* If the whole novel is like this, it will be a book that delights eggheads like me, who are highly familiar with the original. Basically, it will be the literary equivalent of watching Shrek with your kids and getting all the references and innuendos that the little ones miss and that were obviously included just for adult amusement.

It seems there have been equally loud scoffings from both Austenites and Zombieites, both of whom are claiming that to pair the two is only to the detriment of the classic literature/story lines they so prize. Also, a small contingent is complaining that zombies are so 2008. But I predict that all of these naysayers will be in the minority, and I look forward to a year or two of awesome horror movies in which all the main characters are dressed in period costumes and know how to pour a really really good cup of tea.

With a cover like this**, don't you suspect that this novel will shoot almost immediately to the top of the New York Times Bestseller list?


I don't know about you, but the only thing I'm looking forward to more than reading the book itself is reading The Bloggess's take on it; she's sure to jump on anything with zombies, right? But oh, how I wish Chronicle Books would send me a review copy hot off the presses so I could tell you all about it myself!


* The original first sentence of this novel is, "It is a truth universally acknowledged that a young man in possession of a fortune must be in want of a wife." ***

** One beauty, to me, of this cover is that despite the fact that the Austen novel is out of copyright, the authorship on this new novel is "Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith." Classy. Perfectly right, of course. But also, classy.

*** Edited to add: it has been pointed out to me that I have misquoted this first sentence, which I blame on my sleepless state due to my fractious toddler. The man need not be young; he only need be single. Also, the fortune must be a good one. Thanks, Jenniebee, for putting me right.


To learn more about this promising book, check out these articles.

(And don't miss your chance to score yourself some free lotion, guaranteed to ward off zombies. Well, not really guaranteed; perhaps more like suggested. By me. But worth a shot.)