The Siren Call of Stuff (part 1)

It is two weeks after Christmas, and my son is begging for more stuff. There are several Star Wars legos models that he craves, having seen them in the advertisement directions pamphlet that came with the ship he got from his grandparents. (That strike's for you, Marinka.) My daughter longs for a "Dora necklace that's pink and purple" in that way that only three-year-olds can, which is to say that she has a very distinct picture in her mind of what she wants, though she's never seen the necklace herself, and is quite sure that it is obviously purchaseable if only her Mama would take her to the store to buy it.

We largely managed to avoid accumulating junkish stuff over the holidays. There were books and a globe and family games for gifts, a few highly desired toys (the aforementioned legos and a Light Brite), and several things designed to combat the long grey winters we have, such as a giant inflatable punching bag and kids' sized boxing gloves, a brightly colored applique-flowered skirt and lots of art supplies. We eschewed items needing batteries and no imagination. We cleared the toy chest of all the random baby toys that were still sitting around. In short, we have managed to rein in the toys to a considerable degree.

And yet. Despite all the wonderful new, creative things lying around, my children have an almost insatiable desire for more stuff.

They want tiny, cheap, little plastic gizmos that break easily. They want "collections." They want "just one more" of nearly everything they already have. Husband, quite reasonably, I thought, asked Son the other day why he wanted more of something when he doesn't spend that much time playing with the ones he already owns. Son had no good answer.

But that didn't stop him from wanting.

Indeed, they both pine. They cajole and wheedle. They fondle toys when we go into Target for toothpaste. They beg for candy at the grocery store. They ask to make special trips to various stores to procure random items that their friends brought to school that day. (No, no, and no are my responses, respectively.)

It's not that they are influenced by the crack that is commercials for children's stuff. In fact, my children see almost no commercials whatsoever. Most of what they watch on TV is recorded or on demand. The only channels I will turn on for them to watch are Nick Jr. (no commercials) or CBC Kids (no commercials) or the Food Network (commercials, but none of them for plastic gimcracks emblazoned with sparkly ponies).

And much as I'd like to say it is all the fault of stuff-laden classmates with their pink sparkly princess dresses and Tech Decks for show-and-tell, that wouldn't be accurate either. Even if every child in their classes were stuff-spoiled (and in truth, I'm not convinced that most of them are), the desires inspired by their friends, while specific, are generally very short lived. And anyway, I could handle it if there were some one thing they each really really really wanted, and saved for, and dreamed about, and planned towards.

But that's not it.

Instead, it's a constant steady stream of "Mama, can I have...?" and "I want" and "Can't we just buy...?" Like drops of water slowly wearing down a stone, it is as if they hope to weaken my resistance to the point where I just throw up my hands and cry out, "Yes, yes, of course, you can have it all! Let's go out and buy everything in the whole wide world!"

Is this a factor of their ages? Or something much more? Do your kids beg and plead for more more more, even without precedents for the answer ever being "yes"?

(I am still chewing on my own answers to these questions. Part 2 of this post, on what I think might be motivating this desire for useless stuff, is coming soon.)